Vexations
by chatnoir1
Summary: A Loki centered series exploring things/people that vex Loki and vice versa. It begins with Darcy, since I've had a lot of requests for another Darcy/Loki fic. A.N. Complete for right now unless inspiration hits.
1. Darcy

**Vexations**

**A.N.: **Marvel played with the Norse myth and now I'm playing with Marvel. I do not own any characters apart from a few O.C.s and since they are operating in the Marvel Universe, it's possible I don't own them either. Which is sad.

I've gotten several requests to do another fic with Darcy and Loki, so she gets the first chapter.

**Darcy**

Thor and Jane had gone camping for a few days, which meant that Darcy could claim the bed. Sleeping on the sofa sucked, but it beat staying in a shelter or a bedbug ridden motel until she could find a new place to live. She was lucky, in a way, her apartment had mostly suffered water damage. A lot of water damage. Still, she'd been able to salvage the things she regarded as most important - some of her clothes, her phone, her iPod, her laptop, her taser and her lingerie. She'd just broken those bras in, dammit. A noise from the direction of the kitchen woke her. Shit.

Where was her taser? Shit. There it was. She picked it up and ninja stealthed towards the sound. There was a person shape a bit lighter than the dark kitchen, too tall for Jane and too thin for Thor. She shot it with her taser and it went down, twitching. Feeling a bit more confident now, Darcy flipped on the light switch. There, on the kitchen floor, unconscious, was Loki. Shit. She was so so dead, and probably in a painful way. She did the only thing she could think of to do - she took one of the pillows from the sofa and put it underneath Loki's head, then she returned to the bedroom, grabbed Jane's brand new baseball bat and set it within reach of the bed, then barricaded the door. She crawled back up onto the bed and eventually nodded off.

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Darcy's brain was attempting to get her attention, poking at her with increasing urgency, trying to wake her up. With a moan she took note, though her eyes remained closed. She became aware that something heavier than a comforter was on top of her. She opened her eyes and found green ones staring back at her. Thery were close. Too damn close. Thor's little brother was conscious, in the room with her and straddling her thighs. Her camisole had slipped down into wardrobe malfunction area. Shit. She could see that the bedroom door was still barricaded, which meant she couldn't escape very easily even if she managed to get out from underneath Loki. Shit. And he now had hold of her arms. Shit. Shit. Shit.

"Ehm. Hi?"

"You tasered me." Loki let go of one of Darcy's arms and tickled the end of her nose with a green feather. "The question remains, how should I take my revenge for that? I could give you feathers, as I did Jane Foster. I found dozens of these laying about. She isn't much of a house cleaner it appears."

"I could fix breakfast for you." Darcy started to shift her position, but it only managed to bare most of her right breast for Loki's perusal. Loki smirked. Bastard.

"Are you a good cook?" Loki trailed the feather across Darcy's exposed chest and she shivered.

_*Don't you dare get perky nips, don't you dare...damn*_

"No. Not really. I could nuke some pancakes in the microwave."

"My taste buds are in a state of euphoria at the mere thought. You are capable of making coffee, I hope, since a mortal child of five could manage that." With another smirk, Loki got off of Darcy. "I will wait for you in the kitchen. I strongly suggest that you do your best to impress me."

_*Just kill me now*._ Most of her clothes were in boxes in the living room, along with the rest of the crap she'd salvaged from the apartment. She'd been sleeping in the camisole and a pair of sweat pants. Hoping Loki wouldn't pop back into the bedroom, she grabbed her bra, which was laying on the floor next to the bed, put it on and finished off with a more modest t-shirt which had a replica of Captain America's shield on it. Thor's, she figured. She removed the barricade from in front of the door and headed towards the kitchen.

Loki glanced up at her as she walked in, snorted at her attire, then continued to read something on Darcy's laptop. "Do you know that there are fan fictions that pair us as a couple?"

Darcy thought about telling Loki to get the hell off her laptop. But he was already pissed off at her and with him being a taco short of a combo platter, it was probably better to humor the crazy god. "That's kind of weird. We don't really hang out together." Darcy started the coffee. "Or even like each other."

"Is that the only thing you see wrong with it?" Loki shook his head. Darcy put a knife and two forks on the table, along with sugar, cream, butter and syrup, then put the first group of Aunt Jemima pancakes into the mircrowave.

"I haven't had my coffee yet. Otherwise, I'd be outraged. You're like at least a thousand years old. So, that's not cool."

"Is this a sample of the sparkling breakfast conversation I can expect?" Loki raised one elegant eyebrow.

"You were expecting us to talk?" Darcy poured a cup of coffee for each of them and put a plate of microwave pancakes in front of Loki.

"Jane Foster and I converse when I stop by." Loki added sugar and cream to his coffee, butter and syrup to his pancakes. He took an experimental bite. "You know, Captain Rogers cooks real pancakes. I'm not sure what to call these. Barely edible comes to mind."

Darcy sat down with her own pancakes. "If you don't like them, don't eat them. I'm sure Steve would be happy to pause in his duties with the Avengers to fix you a short stack."

"You're a very vexing small mortal female." Loki took a second bite of the pancakes and decided that, actually, they weren't that bad.

"Yeah? Well, you're a very irritating tall skinny Norse god." Darcy made a mental note to check into this so called Loki/Darcy fan fiction. To be honest, Loki was gorgeous, and it wasn't as if she hadn't thought about jumping his bones, especially after seeing those nude pics of him. Yep. But she'd already done the 'yeah he's crazy, but I can fix him' routine with her ex. So not going there. 'Cause you couldn't fix them, all you could do was damage control. Loki would need a hell of a lot of damage control.

"You wound me." Loki finished his pancakes and drank the last of the coffee. "That was a remarkably unmemorable breakfast."

"You're welcome. You've never told me why you're here." Darcy picked up her own plate and Loki's, then placed them in the sink.

"You haven't asked, but it is of no concern to you."

"Well. I'm the only one here, so it kinda is, especially if you're gonna do the mischief thing or something evil. Thor and Jane won't be back for a few days yet." Darcy refreshed her coffee. She realized that perhaps she shouldn't have given that bit of info to Loki. She really shouldn't have conversations with supervillains until she's had at least three cups of coffee.

"Very well. I came to let Thor know that the Bifrost has been repaired. So he will no longer need me to escort him through the ways."

"See. That wasn't so hard. Info received. Now you can go and annoy someone else. Someone more interesting."

Loki frowned at her. "I will leave when I am ready. Though this is becoming rather boring, and I hate to be bored." He sighed. "So, perhaps you're right." Loki quietly said a few words, made a couple of gestures, then Darcy crumpled and fell to the floor. Loki didn't bother to catch her. He said a few more words, made a few more gestures, then he was ready to go. He wrote a short note to Darcy and placed it on the floor next to her. Then he left, laughing.

A short while later, Darcy woke up feeling strangely refreshed. She yawned, stretched, opened her eyes. Then she screamed. She was naked and covered in tiny iridescent scales, they reminded her of a drangonfly's wings. She'd been Loki'd. Damn. She picked up the note and read the elegantly penned message.

_"I thought about giving you feathers, but I've already done that, and I do hate repeating myself. The spell should wear off in a couple of days, if not, Thor can hunt me down when he returns."_

Son of a bitch. She hoped Jane still had that burqa.

Needless to say, an unamused Thor had to hunt Loki down. Even with his ability to heal himself, Loki nursed bruises for a few days.


	2. Bruce

**Bruce (With a guest appearance by Nick Fury)**

It was a typical early afternoon at the Avengers mad house. Steve was finishing his Sweet Onion Chicken Teriyaki sandwich from Subway when an excited Bruce and Tony came rushing in, acting far too giddy for a couple of scientists.

"I think we finally have it, Steve." Tony headed for the bar to pour himself a celebratory scotch. "Loki repellent. The next time the little shit shows up unannounced, he'll be in for a surprise. His all-access pass has been revoked."

Steve had his doubts that they would ever be able to bar the Trickster from their residence, but he wisely kept it to himself. "That would be great. If I'd known you guys were coming up for air, I would have gotten your usual order from Subway. Last time I interrupted you making science, Tony threw a wrench at me, then a screwdriver and part of a robot."

Bruce laughed and headed off for a shower and change of clothes. He felt like getting out for a while. Maybe going to a real restaurant, one with actual silverware in place of plastic, real plates instead of paper and snooty waitpersons instead of surly pimply adolescent fast food workers.

Tony had just finished his scotch, when JARVIS interrupted his perusal of the various take out / delivery menus stacked in a box on the kitchen counter.

"Excuse me sir, but Director Fury is on his way up. He seems to be rather worked up about something."

"Fury is always pissed off about something. It's his natural state."

Fury was moving before the elevator doors were open. He had a iPad in his left hand. "We've got a situation at the Mall of America. The Hulk is there. He hasn't smashed anything yet, though he did punch Spongebob Squarepants. As you might expect, the public is kinda upset. I need a response team, see if you can calm him back down to Banner size."

"Well, that would leave me out, since I'm more of an aggravator. Besides, Bruce is here. We've been working on Loki repellent, and he's gone to change clothes. So, he's not at the MOA."

"Then why in the hell am I being sent video of him?" Fury showed them the video on his iPad.

"Black capris with thin gold stripes? Bruce? I don't think so. That pretty much screams Loki." Steve nodded. "The Hulk is green, and green, black and gold are kinda Loki's signature colors."

"Son of a bitch. Mother fucking megalomaniacal glow stick waving psychopathic brat with fucking daddy issues. Why is he on my planet?"

"I don't know the answer to that sir, but he seems content with just making mischief." Fury turned his one eye of balefulness on Steve and the latter regretted having spoken. Bruce walked in and took a look at the iPad.

"Huh. Gold and black capris? Must be Loki. I prefer purple. What's he doing?"

"Taking years off of my damn life that I don't have to spare." Fury rubbed his temples.

"I don't see him anymore, so I guess he teleported. Gotta hand it to him. That was a good likeness he pulled off."

Fury simply stared at Bruce for several seconds, then turned and left.

"Well, that was fun, wasn't it." Tony went back to looking at the menus and Bruce headed to the elevator. Fury's eyepatch made him think of pirates and pirates made him think of seafood, so he took out his Android to check for nearbys seafood restaurants.

0000000000

It was now an atypical early evening at the Avenger's madhouse. The only one present was Bruce, who was sitting on the sofa working soduku puzzles, while "March of the Penguins" played on the tv. There was a slight pop, a flash of green, then Loki joined him on the sofa.

Bruce looked up from his soduku puzzle. "Damn. That's very disappointing."

Loki gave Bruce a puzzled look. "What is disappointing?"

"The fact that you are here sitting on the sofa." Loki continued to look puzzled, "Tony and I have been working on Loki-proofing the place. We thought we had it, but I guess not."

Loki snorted. "Indeed. I feel as if I should be insulted, but I'm famished, and all I can manage at present is a haughty snort of derision." Loki produced a paper bag and removed a Reuben sandwich and a bottle of Diet Pepsi. Loki took a bite of the enormous sandwich and smiled in pure bliss. "Everyone's always talking about the Carnegie Deli, but nothing beats a Reuben from Katz's."

Bruce shook his head, bemused by the thought that there was a Norse god sitting on the sofa eating takeout from a Jewish deli and it seemed normal. "Fury dropped by earlier, it seems he thought I was terrorizing toddlers and their parents at the Mall of America. Nice performance, by the way. I wish you hadn't punched Spongebob, though."

"That monstrosity was either hugging or sham humping my leg, I couldn't tell for sure. But I'd had enough. I thought the gold and black capris would be a dead giveaway. For someone who heads an intelligence agency, Fury is depressingly dull at times." Loki frowned at the tv, then picked up the remote and changed channels. Bruce then frowned at Loki.

"Excuse me, but I'm watching that."

"No you aren't, you're working sudoku puzzles. Besides, it's a movie about penguins. The only things more boring than penguins are sloths."

"I am multitasking." Bruce picked up the remote and switched back to the penguins.

"I have no idea what that means."

"It means I am doing more than one thing at a time. In this case I am watching the penguin movie and doing sudoku puzzles."

"Well, I want to watch something else." Loki snatched the remote from Bruce's hand and channel surfed until he came across 'The Big Bang Theory'. "Yes. This will do nicely. I do enjoy Sheldon."

"That doesn't surprise me. I will give you one more chance. Put the penguin movie back on before I get angry." Bruce looked Loki directly in the eyes and Loki could see Bruce's irises becoming more green, and there was a green tint around the eyes. He put the penguin movie back on, took his sandwich and went to sit at the kitchen table.

"Thank you."

Loki responded with an obscene gesture.

Once he finished his sandwich, Loki teleported to Bruce's room. He tried to think of something he could do in revenge that wouldn't be too terribly destructive. Thor had made it painfully clear that he wasn't going to tolerate any more tantrums, which was such a shame, since Loki was so good at them. He sighed. He settled for changing all of Bruce's briefs to thongs, his wardrobe to green, gold and black, the bed sheets to emerald green with his signature helmet embroidered on them, and placed a framed nude portrait of himself on the wall that was signed 'XXXOOO Loki' (he put a spell on it so it couldn't be removed nor could it be altered). If Banner Hulked out and destroyed his room, well, it wasn't Loki's fault that he couldn't take a joke.

Bruce to his credit and control, took it all in stride. Natasha actually offered to change out rooms with him, not that the naked portrait of Loki had anything to do with it, of course. Bruce declined, though he did rearrange his furnishings so that the portrait wasn't across from the bed. And he had to replace his clothing and bedsheets. But considering what Loki was capable of, it could have been much worse.


	3. Clint

**CLINT (guest appearance by Dr. Doom)**

Loki couldn't believe he was once again in Latveria. What the hell was he thinking. He looked across the table at Victor von Doom, who was pouring red wine of unknown vintage from a rather gaudy decanter. Honestly, the mortal had no taste. "You do realize I will accept neither food nor drink from you, do you not? The last time you guested me, I awoke cuffed face down on an X-shaped frame, with my powers suppressed. You proceded to educate me on the concept of 'safe words', and informed me that the safe word was Victor. I believe I rolled my eyes at that point. As I recall, you then beat me with bound branches. It was most unpleasant."

Doom nodded. "I birched you. It was very satisfying on an emotional level, enabling me to have vengeance of a sorts for your many betrayals. I was, however, disappointed by the fact that you broke far sooner than I expected. I had to bring my little experiment to an end before your fruitless screaming of 'Victor' ruptured your vocal cords. Though I did enjoy hearing my name screamed by you with such desperation. And I must protest the fact that you levelled a good portion of my castle in retaliation. I lost many good Doombots."

Loki narrowed his eyes to mere slits. "It's a pity you didn't end up under the rubble. You are a sadistic bastard, Victor. As much as I love these visits, I do have things to attend to. Why did you wish to see me?"

"I am concerned about you. These divertissements you enage in are childish and unworthy. I fear you have lost your focus and as an occasional ally, this causes me no little consternation. I do have a reputation to maintain."

"Ah. Are you thinking that perhaps that I need, what is the term, an 'intervention'? Counseling from the brotherhood of super-villains? Set firmly back upon the path of evil?" Loki snorted. "My little amusements are done purely for my entertainment. The fact that they also cause problems for Thor and his merry band of do-gooders is a bonus. Rest assured that I do have a plan, of a more subtle nature this time. It suits me better."

"It did occur to me, briefly, upon seeing the nude photos of you on the internet, that perhaps you were planning to conquer the world through pornography. You are well equipped for it."

Loki smirked and nodded his head in acknowledgement. "Though I have been inconvenienced because of those photos, they have given me a certain celebrity, which is useful. I took your advice on hiring a public relations firm, and your recommendation. So far, it's worked out well. I've brought you copies of my photo shoots and articles."

"That is very kind of you. They won't combust into flames or explode, I trust."

Loki placed his right hand on his heart. "I promise. Now if you will excuse me, I have some errands to run back in Manhattan."

True to Loki's word, there was neither fire nor explosion, which surprised the hell out of Doom and caused him to worry once again. The Liesmith telling the truth?.

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Clint had just picked up his shawarma order and as he sat down he happened to glance out the window. WTF? He could not believe it. There stood Loki, surrounded by a group of nuns, who were taking turns snapping photos with him. This was just so wrong in ways Clint couldn't find the words to express. The nuns should be whacking Loki with a ruler, shaking their fingers at him, expressing their disapproval. Not giggling like a group of school girls. Sure, Loki was good looking in an edgy sort of way, but he was a super-villain for fuck's sake. Clint watched as Loki finally managed to extricate himself from the nuns and went into a Starbucks.

Clint kept an eye on the door to Starbucks as he ate his shawarma, watching for Loki. He never saw him exit, but that didn't mean anything, when Loki could teleport. Having finished his meal, he crossed the street (illegally), and took a quick look inside the coffee shop. No Loki. Damn. Clint exited and started down the street, scanning the area around him. He was looking down an alley, when a voice spoke directly behind him.

"Are you stalking me for some reason, Agent Barton?"

Clint acted instinctively, spinning around and landing a sucker punch to Loki's jaw. The Trickster went down. Shit. Oh shit. People on the sidewalk gave them a cursory glance, then continued on their way, going around the downed Norse god, who was rubbing his jaw and glaring at the archer. There was a shrill shriek of anger and a half dozen young women jumped Clint, scratching at him, yanking at his hair, kicking and punching him. WTF?

"Loki, call off your bitches." At that point one of the young women kneed him in the groin and Clint joined Loki on the sidewalk.

"That was a rather poor choice of words, I think." Loki got to his feet chuckling. "My deepest appreciation fair maidens, for your timely assistance." He smiled and inclined his head.

The young women looked on the verge of passing out in a hormonal fueled ecstasy. "Our deepest pleasure is to serve you, my Lord." The young women knelt and Loki smiled like Lewis Carroll's Cheshire cat.

Clint managed to get to his feet, groaning. "I think I'm going to throw up." He shook his head as he watched Loki motion for his followers to rise. When did the world get so fucked up? The young women rose and Loki spoke a few words to them, then they left.

Loki gestured towards the departing young women. "My new army. Much better looking than the last one, would you not agree?"

"So you are out corrupting America's daughters now." Clint suppressed an urge to massage his sore genitals.

"There are also male recruits, just not as many. I found the whole concept odd at first, but I'm beginning to enjoy it."

Clint snorted. "Yeah, you would. So what's your shtik this time?"

"My stick? I haven't one. You confiscated my scepter when I attempted to take over this insignificant rock." Loki looked a bit confused.

"No, your shtik, not stick." Loki looked more confused. "S.h.t.i.k., it means a devious trick, mischief or prank used to get attention. Like making velociraptors run amok in Times Square, or animating park statues."

"Ah. Thank you for the clarification and my shtik is none of your business."

Clint crossed his arms. "Keeping an eye on you is my business. I don't need another bunch of skanky aliens invading my planet."

"Allow me to rest your fears on that point at least. I have no intention of bringing another alien army to Midgard. I've already tried that and I learn from my failures. The Chitauri were a mistake. A rather large one."

"Yeah. But I know you have to be up to something. It's what you do."

Loki held his arms up in surrender. "I can't put one over on you, Agent Barton. I do indeed have plans. This is Wednesday, and I am on my way to the New York Botanical Garden for Greenmarket. I enoy the cooking demonstrations and the chance to purchase locally grown produce and fresh bread. Felice is usually there with her wonderful rosemary bread. She will be terribly disappointed if I do not come." Loki smirked. "I know, not quite the villainy you were expecting of me, was it?"

Clint shook his head. Nope. Not even on his top 100 list.

"If I were you, Agent Barton, I would take Agent Romanoff out for a quiet meal, maybe even a romantic one. Might I suggest Balthazar. It's very Parisian and you don't get more romantic than the French. Human lives are so short, and it is a shame to waste yours obsessed with what I may or may not do in the near future. Just a suggestion."

Clint took out his iPhone to make a reservation, and call Natasha. When he looked up, Loki was gone. Nat, of course, expected a trap of some sort, but they had a very pleasant and blessedly uninterrupted meal. Which worried both of them. Loki had to be up to something.

Loki, upon his return from Greenmarket, spent his evening playing Sims 3. He downloaded a custom figure of Nick Fury in a maid's outfit, and set him to cleaning Stark Mansion. Life is good.


	4. Fury

**FURY**** (Special appearances by Frigga and Odin)**

Nick Fury was indulging himself with a rare lunch out at his favorite steak house, The Strip House Grill. A 16oz NY Strip, washed down with a glass or two of Malbec red wine, a Bodega Catena Zapata. He was as close to mellow as he would ever get. So, it was inevitable that something, or in this case, someone would kill his buzz. He had taken the last sips of his wine and he was about to leave when he heard it. The unmistakeable cultured voice of one Loki Laufeyson Odinson. Oh hell no. The universe fucking had it in for him. He headed towards the voice.

Loki was holding court. There was a plate with crisped Scottish salmon in front of him along with a bottle of Sineann Oregon Pinot Noir and admirers on all sides. A woman with the look of a publicist sat across from him. Fury stood there just glaring at him until Loki deigned to notice his existence.

"Nicholas." Loki smirked. Damn him.

"Real Power. Ever get your magazine?" Fury thought he saw a flash in Loki's green eyes.

"Better. I've been photographed and interviewed in a few." There were murmurs of approval from Loki's admirers.

"Yeah. I've heard. You're a popular pin up in all the best maximum security prisons." Another flash.

Loki shrugged. "They probably put me next to pictures of Captain America in that tight spandex uniform. As much as I hate to admit it, he has a nice ass, possibly superior to my own. It's a shame no one has pounded that glorious ass yet. He's not my type, though." Loki smirked again.

Damn smirking son of a bitch. "Really? Word on the street is you have no type. Hell. Your own brother calls you The Whore of the Nine Realms."

Loki raised his eyebrows. "I do have some standards." Loki looked him up and down. "Take you for example. While I love the coat, I'm not sure about the rest of the package. Not to offend, but for us to have sex, I'd have to be very drunk and it would have to be very dark."

Fury snorted. "Not to offend, but you're not exactly my idea of a wet dream either. More like a nightmare."

"You flatter me Nicholas. You bore me as well, so why don't you run along and go play den mother."

Fury snorted. "I'll be a lot happier when you get off my damn planet and become Daddy's problem again."

Loki responded with yet another smirk and a cheery wave as Fury left. But underneath it all, he was royally pissed.

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Damn Fury. Damn irritating cyclops with delusions of bad assery. Loki would show him bad assery. He wrote the fucking book on it. He was bad ass when Fury was still shitting in his diapers. But right now, he was going to raid Jane's refrigerator for ice cream. It was just what he needed to restore his good humor. Loki popped into the kitchen. Everything seemed quiet, which suited him just fine, thank you very much. Muttering profanities under his breath in Old Norse, he opened the freezer compartment. There were the expected pints of Ben & Jerry's - Cherry Garcia, Mint Chocolate Cookie and Mud Pie. And a few of those over-priced Magnum ice cream bars. Decisions, decisions. He grabbed the pint of Mud Pie and closed the freezer door. He turned around and his eyes widened, while his eyebrows threatened to crawl up past his hairline. "Mother?"

Frigga stood there, dressed in her Asgardian robes, her arms crossed. "Loki."

"Not that this isn't a pleasant surprise, but why are you here?" Loki opened a drawer and took out a spoon, paused for a second, then grabbed a bowl from the dish rack. Yes he was an adult and yes he did what he wanted, but it was best not to let his mother see him eat directly from the carton. It was bound to lead to a tedious lecture on manners.

"I could ask the same of you."

Loki nodded his head in agreement, "I often stop by when I am in the area and feeling peckish." A thought came to him. "How did you find me?" Before Frigga could answer him, Loki reached his own conclusion. "Heimdall." Frigga nodded. "That still doesn't answer the question of why."

"Your father requests your assistance on a diplomatic matter of some importance."

An elegant eyebrow rose, and Loki allowed himself a miniscule smirk. "Does he?"

"Do you spend hours practicing that look in front of a mirror?" Frigga shook her head. "When your father requests, he commands, as you well know."

Loki snorted. How well he knew. "If I refuse, I assume you will drag me back to Asgard by the ear like some sort of recalcitrant child?"

"Of course not. I would never humiliate you in such a fashion." Frigga smiled. "If you refuse, your father will come for you."

The very thought caused a shiver of dread to run down Loki's spine. "I would much rather that he not." Loki sighed. "Very well. There are prior commitments I will have to cancel or reschedule. It shouldn't take long." Loki took out his cell phone and began making calls, while Frigga sampled one of the Magnum bars.

Feeling rather put upon and disgruntled, Loki finished off the carton of Mud Pie. It didn't help as much as he had hoped and he was still having a sulk when they arrived at Asgard.

00000000

Loki stood in front of the All-Father in the Great Hall, his arms crossed, his chin raised. Odin stared him down from his throne, until Loki bent his head in respect. Odin grunted in satisfaction.

Loki raised his head once more. "I was told there was a diplomatic matter of some urgency."

"Did I give you leave to speak, boy?" Odin raised his left eyebrow.

"No." Loki hated this, he absolutely hated this. "I ask the All-Father's forgiveness."

"And I grant it." Odin sighed. "There will be a diplomatic emissary from Nidavellir arriving within a few days. I require your assistance. You may speak now."

"A dwarf? You want me to meet with a dwarf? That race holds nothing but ill feelings towards me."

"Dwarves, actually. He will have others with him. And yes, I do. In fact, I shall insist that they meet with you and you alone. I will tell them that you have my full confidence to negotiate on behalf of Asgard."

Loki could have sworn that his adoptive father just smirked. It must have been a trick of the light. "They will be most unhappy."

"I'm counting on it. Negotiations will be blessedly short. In fact, if they are disgruntled enough, they may decide that they have no true grievances to discuss, as I suspect, and return home immediately."

Loki could not help the chuckle that escaped. "You are truly a wise and crafty ruler."

"It would serve you well to remember that. We will meet on the morrow to discuss this further. Your mother and I will expect your presence when we break fast."

"I have your permission to take my leave, then?"

Odin waved his hand dismissively. "Go. I'm sure you want to check out the new additions to the library."

Loki left, his mood significantly lightened. This might indeed prove an entertaining visit home. Tormenting dwarves was always fun.


End file.
